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What am I upto....?

I feel I do not belong here
This world unfair
Hatred, emotions, unnecessary things all along
Wherever I go, I feel unattached
I feel lonely in a crowd
The moon amongst the stars
I feel tired
As if am rowing from one sea to another
Around the world and back again
Am unable to take certain things as they are
Am I not trained for it, or am I just not made for it?
My destiny is unsure
I don’t know where I wanna go
It seems as if I have still not come across the path I need to take
Or… have I just missed a turn on my way?
I don’t know
I didn’t see the yellow brick
I don’t know where to look for directions
I don’t understand this trick

I feel I need a guide
Who would it be?
I am unable to see such a person in anybody around
All they say seem to be in a course different from where am destined to go
Am searching for it everyday I search for it everywhere I go
I don’t know what to do
I haven’t been like this before
I see friends and foes alike
True friends on one and foes with masks on the other
Equal sides of the lake
I fall prey
What do I pray?

That I don’t have foes?
Nay… what’s god without the demon?
That I understand who’s the foe n who’s not?
Neither… I can’t get along smiling at one
I see friends n foes alike
I see ‘em all smile at me
I smile back
Share a part of my life
I don’t care what they think I am to them
They still are my friends
There’s something in believing
Despite the deceit
Despite the disappointments
Despite the wounds
There’s something in believing
In trust
The joy that comes by
I don’t worry
Cos I know I trust you
No matter what
You may disappoint me
But I’ll not
I’d probably still trust you
And the one that comes along too
It keeps me free
Free from all entanglements
It’s simplistic I know
But you see…
It’s just me!

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Comments

Bala said…
Good one.. I don't enjoy poems as much I enjoy stories or write ups, but this one was really good..

The inner pain and struggle is beautifully expressed which is actually difficult to do so, that too through a poem... Keep going..
12 April 2010 at 11:55 pm
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